EXPERIENCING SELF PITY? USE HUMOR AS YOUR WEAPON
PUTTING A FACE ON THE HUMAN RACE
EXPERIENCING SELF PITY? TRY TAP-DANCING
IT AWAY ON THE STAGE OF LIFE!
We are all starring in The Theater of the
Absurd. Look into the mirror. See yourself?
Even at your saddest moment of
wretchedness, study the character gawking
back at you. Notice the bloodshot eyes, the
twitch, the frown etched in deep furrows.
Pretty pathetic, huh? Now look deeper. There’s
a gladiator hiding behind that gloomy
facade. I don’t care how you’ve failed
or how your spirit was damaged. Give your
memory sack a good shake and there’ll be
an assortment of memorable moments spilling
out. Guaranteed, you’re gonna find something
to howl, growl or smile about. I know, I know.
You’re uncomfortable. But don’t hide. You’re
tap-dancing under the glare of the spotlight,
sharing the stage with billions whose tragedies
would dwarf the grief you’re experiencing.
You’re suffering an ego attack. Maybe a broken
heart? Everybody gets them. So stop fretting!
Even in the midst of catastrophic sadness,
there is humor. When my childhood friend,
Dick (Bumbo) Channon died at 52, I had his mother
and sister laughing. I dropped a handful of
bubble gum into his open casket. Memories are
made of happiness. Fun, never dies easy.
When my Irish pal, Frank Francis O’Leary
recently kicked the bucket, I wrote a
story turning the portly aerospace
physicist into a leprechaun stuck in a
tree. Death might be an emotional disaster for
many, but beyond those woe-be-gone tears lurks
the soul of truth that’s ready to spring forth
and bite you on the buttocks, infecting your
solemnness with happy memories. Truth harbors
a helluva sense of humor. You just gotta remember
the good times. So, if you want to temporarily
overcome those doldrums, here’s my suggestion:
Go into the bathroom and lock the door. As I
suggested earlier, find the mirror. You’re all
alone, right? Now bend over and give yourself
a kick in the ass. If you’re not double-
jointed, pull down your pants or panties and
“moon” the mirror. That act, I suspect, will give
you good reason to rise above self pity. You might even
realize what a pathetic looking asshole you are.
Remember: Laughter beats tears.
— Boots LeBaron —