Posts Tagged ‘ Christmas ’

DESPITE NEGATIVISM, NEVER GIVE UP HOPE

THE HUMAN RACE

 

SANTA’S TALLEST ELF BEATS ADVERSITY!

 

Life is difficult. Even at Christmastime.

Daphne, one of Santa’s many Elves, is living

proof that when you’re teased, ignored and

cast aside, you can rise above your heartache.

All you need is courage and the will to smile

despite your imperfections. Daphne experienced

such adversity regularly at, of all places,

Santa’s workshop in the North Pole. That’s

where the itsy-bitsy Elves harassed the hard-

working Daphne because they judged her for

being too lanky. At six-foot-one, she

towered over them like a skyscraper above

an igloo. Since she loved to trip the light

fantastic, to overcome her feelings of

inadequacy, after an exhausting day making

puppets and other surprises, she’d dance

her way to bed. That’s when her fellow toy

makers would look down their large noses

at her chanting, “Twinkle Toes, Twinkle

Toes with your teeny-weeny nose-e-nose.”

One night as the aurora borealis lit up the

sky, Daphne hopped the first available sleigh

and headed for the Big Apple (also known

as New York City). Despite her height and

large pointy ears, Daphne was given a warm

welcome by a group of charming  chorus girls

who judged her for her ability to dance,

sing and smile brightly. They didn’t care

that Daphne didn’t meet their height require

ment of 5-foot-8 or so. She was as tall

and she loved to smile . Although she missed

 the tiny North Pole co-workers, Daphne a

reason to be cheerful. She became the

newest member of a world-famous troupe

of high kickers known as The Rockettes.

Peace of mind, you see, is a precious gift

that even old Kriss Kringle can’t deliver.

— Boots LeBaron —

(Boots’ current book THE HUMAN RACE is now

available on Kindle and in paperback on Amazon.

It contains human interest interviews as well as

essays and light poetry about life, courage, love, etc.)

LOOK TO THE STARS TO HEAL YOUR PERSONAL SOAP-OPERA

THE HUMAN RACE

ASTROLOGICAL  FORECASTS YOU WON’T FIND IN

THE journal SCIENCE OR ON TV’S BREAKING NEWS:

Aquarius:  Today you will bring tears

to the eyes of those you are close to.

Take a mint. You have halitosis.

 

Aries: To fill the emptiness in your

 life, buy or adopt a dog.  It will give

you what humans aren’t capable of:  True

love, absolute trust and a sloppy lick.

 

Pisces: As a senior citizen, beware

of a sudden change in the attitude

of your adult children. They are

turning into your parents.

 

Taurus: Tonight, your best cure for insomnia

 is to make love to your sex-deprived mate.

As the aligned planets declare:  Don’t

procrastinate, you’ll rise up to the challenge!

 

Gemini: If you’re suffering with a

four-hour Viagra erection, don’t call

your physician. Planets are affirming

that today you’re blessed with the op-

portunity to satisfy the needs of many.

 

Cancer: Especially today, don’t fall

in love with yourself. You’re not

worth it.

 

Leo: Now is the opportune time to

take credit for the marketing ideas

created by your assistant.

 

Virgo: You can’t afford to become enraged

at the man who’s having an affair with

your wife. He’s your employer!

 

Libra: For the sake of sanity, don’t ask your

 secretary to bring you coffee, lie to your

wife or take his laundry to the dry cleaners.

She knows you for what you are:

A CHAUVINISTIC HORSE’S ASS!

 

Scorpio: Warning to passionate lovers.

In the heat of the night, don’t forget to

turn off the electric blanket.

 

Sagittarius: Stay calm when you take your written

driver’s exam. If you sweat, the ink on your palms

will smear ruining your chances to pass the test.

Capricorn: Thanksgiving, Christmas and Hanukkah

revellers, brace for a hurricane during the holiday season!

You’re mother-in-law’s coming to town!  She was

 the out-spoken one who felt you weren’t good enough

to marry her child.  So when the doorbell chimes, be

forewarned.  It ain’t gonna be Santa.

                  — Boots LeBaron —

http://www.amazon.com/The-Human-Race-Boots-LeBaron/dp/1494218526

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